This is what I tried to explain to Jason....

This is a picture of my brain (well, mine does not look that pretty, but it is that scattered!)  I just feel like there is SO MUCH going on in my life and I LOVE it all and I want to KEEP it all but somehow, sometime I have to make sense of it. I need to get things back in order so I don't feel like I am letting stuff slip.  I need to re-prioritize and figure out what I really want.  I have so many ideas and dreams and I WANT it all.  But you know what?  No matter what I do, or what I say, or what I think, there will ALWAYS only be 24 hours in one day.  I can hope, pray, wish, and beg but there will be no more hours in my day.  And there is no way I can do everything I want to do in those measly little 24 hours.  So some things have to go.  Some things need a new placement in the priority list.  Some things just need to get done so I can stop worrying about them.  One of the best pieces of advice I have been given was by my supervisor in Malaysia.  She said, "Janet, you need to pray for God's wisdom as you ask each day, 'Lord, what is most important for me to do TODAY?'"  Because you know what?  No one will get everything done every day.  And I am okay with that.  Some days some things have to be set aside.  My problem is that I seem to let the SAME stuff go every day and overemphasize other things.  I need balance in my life and I can't seem to find it.  So that is my goal and prayer for this summer.  I want to spend some time with God seeking His will for me and my time.  I am pulled in so many directions and I LOVE it all.  I really do.  And there are benefits to some of the things I do that others may not see.  But I do.  And God does.  So, as Alaina would say, "This is a tricky one."  So if you want to pray for me this summer, this is what I need.  I need God to show me EACH day what is most important on THAT day.  Maybe today it is packing.  Or maybe not. Maybe reuniting as a family (Jason will be officially done with his job here in Nebraska in about an hour) is most important.  Maybe it is giving the kids and extra large dose of loving today as they prepare for a little chaos.  Maybe it is checking off some of those nagging things on my to do list that although not hard, are adding up and adding unneeded stress to my day.  Who knows. I need to pray.  And then I just need to go.  Go do what needs to be done. Whatever that may be.  If I could just take all those beautiful little pieces of life that are scattered in my heart and mind and put some order to them, I will feel better.  God is a God of order and I really believe that He created us to crave order to our lives.  I need it.  The mess is making me less effective in life.  Yes Alaina, this IS a tricky one.

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Thanks for all the thank yous and comments on the freebie yesterday!  Glad you liked it! 

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Grey's last night...really, really liked it. I loved the fact that it wasn't a true "cliffhanger" episode.  I really don't like those.  What is the point of making viewers frustrated by having to wait months before finding out the conclusion of something big?  I love the fact that they brought resolution and answers to situations while still leaving us looking forward to finding out more.  I would have been mad if they had ended the show with Burke walking back down the aisle and we never knew what happened.  Oh, and by the way, Sandra Oh's  performance at the end was incredible.  Absolutely amazing.  THAT is acting.  And I love the fact that I am not totally sure if she is happy or sad or a huge mixed-up combination of both. It was incredible.  And I could slap Meredith.  And Callie...go girl.  It's YOUR marriage.  Tell Izzy how it is. Burke's vows.  WOW. Marry me :)  Good show. I am happy.  Silly little things in life bring a smile to my face.

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Just one LO for you today.  Jason left for work at 5:45 and I woke up when he left.  So, I did a little scrapping.

Kraft paper by Gina Cabrera (can you tell I am a little addicted to this Kraft paper?), green paper by Michelle Coleman, alpha by Gina Cabrera (another addiction at the moment, love that I don't scrap chronologically,otherwise my addictions would show), blue stitching by Lisa Barnhurst, loose stitches by Syrin, cardboard pieces by Gina Cabrera. Cardboard buttons by Kim Christensen.

 

Have a GREAT weekend!

Comments

[HilaryG]

Just downloaded yesterday's blog freebie...thanks :)

In response to today's post...that is something that many people (especially women) struggle with. My small insight into this is that trying to let go of what OTHER people think of your choices is very liberating. Also remember that raising small children and frequent moving will make any human feel scattered! Be kind to yourself...

Thanks again for the freebie and for sharing some of yourself on your blog. I enjoy reading it :)

[Heidi Dillon]

Oh, that's how my brain feels too! :)

Thanks for the freebie, and thanks for writing so much. I enjoy reading about what's going on in your life! :)

[Laura]

Such a great reminder! Sometimes things just pile up and are overwhelming, even if it's not anything hard to do sometimes just breaking it down and re-prioritizing, thinking of things individually instead of a huge massive pile of things-to-do really helps!

[Rona]

Lol on the decapitated layout :) Poor er, thing, hehehe.

Thank you for the inspirational words, as always. Yes, not everything will be done, but sometimes for an OC person such as myself, sometimes it is very frustrating. Your words have been very enlightening.