The Well Rounded Mama

Today...4.28.11

 

Outside my window…darkness

I am thinking… that I am really bummed that my keyboard stopped working (the entire bottom row of letters + space bar just don't work).  Thankful that I have a backup keyboard even if it does seem really small.

I am thankful for…the opportunity to be a stay at home mom and being able to focus on loving these little people instead of being pulled in many different directions.

From the kitchen…We had chicken tacos with homemade tortillas for dinner.  Haven't been baking this week since I am fasting from sweets. 

 
I am creating…a few new scrapping layouts and a whole lot of homeschooling activities/games.

I am going…to start running again.  It's hard to get up the motivation, but I know I will love the results when I finally get going.

I am reading…Too Small to Ignore and The Secret Garden (with Alaina).  Just finished 1 Million Arrows and I am still thoroughly enjoying The MIssion of Motherhood, which I am reading and discussing weekly with a friend.  I love the opportunity that nursing gives me to read.  It has been years since I have been able to read this much.

I am hoping… that I can learn to be content with who God made me and then focus on being the best me that I can be.

I am hearing…my fan.

Around the house…Little people asleep, homeschool stuff ready for tomorrow, Jason closing up the house for the night, Lucy sleeping under the crib.

One of my favorite things…Seeing the hearts of my kids grow and be bent towards good things.  Today Caleb brought me his latest Lego airplane and said, "This airplane is to pick up kids who have no mom and dad and either find their parents or bring them to new parents." 

A few plans for the rest of the week: Going to see the school production of Snow White tomorrow afternoon.  The weekend is for rest and celebrating Caleb's 7th birthday.  I can't believe he could possibly be that big!

Here is picture I am sharing…This is Katie, three years ago this week.  She looks EXACTLY like Bethany does now. When I showed the picture to Jason, he had no idea it was Katie.

My Other Little Girl

I spend a lot of time just holding her, loving her, soaking in all her cuddly babyness. Thanks to my computer camera and photobooth, I have a few pictures of some of that baby lovin'.

And even a blurry view of one of the very few smiles she has given us...

My Girls (Well, 2 of the 3)

Today was hard.  Really hard.  But pictures like these remind me that even in the tough times, even in the rough times, even in the I-can't-see-God-anywhere times, I am blessed beyond measure. And thankfully, His mercies are new every morning.  I'm ready for tomorrow.

I Don't Have Easter Pictures

Easter kind of got the shaft this year.

There were no dyed eggs.  There were no new Easter outfits.  There was no Easter Dinner.  There are no Easter Pictures.

I told Jason that I needed to let Easter know that if it wanted a chance to get celebrated, it really needs to come earlier than April 24.  We have been so busy. I know, I know, everyone is busy, but we are at the tail-end of birthday season and we have had celebrating going on for months.  Just a quick recap:

 

January 30 -- Alaina's birthday

February 14 -- Valentines Day

March 6 -- Katie's birthday

March 17 -- Bethany is born!

April 3 -- My birthday

April 6 -- Jason's birthday

April 17 -- Levi's birthday

April 24 -- Easter

May 1 -- Caleb's birthday

May 8 -- Mother's Day

 

Throw in spring break, a big project, "normal" life, and caring for a new baby and I just didn't have it in me.  After all, like Alaina said, "Mom...what in the world do eggs have to do with Jesus??"  Good question, babe.

So, I gladly bestow the mother of the year award on every mom who had their act together. Because I didn't.  I did send Jason out to the store to grab a few treats for Easter baskets...I don't think I could have totally skipped those.  And on Easter afternoon, after church, I did manange to bake a batch of egg-shaped cookies for the kids to decorate (because really, decorating hard boiled eggs isn't as fun as actually wanting to eat what you decorate.) 

And given the fact that Levi had been up a bunch of times the night before throwing up (from coughing so hard), after our sunrise breakfast potluck and church service, this is what most of the day looked like...complete with mattress pulled into the living room.

And there was a lot of this...

So there you have it...our not so Eastery Easter.  I did take some fun photos of the girls the day before, which hopefully I will share soon.  But right now, I am going to hang out with the hubby who just got back from a trip to Jakarta to pick up Bethany's passport.  You'd think that after all these years it would seem normal, but really, a five week old with a passport? Fun times.

Today...4.20.11

Outside my window…rain drizzling in the darkness

I am thinking… that I should really go to bed, but really I just want to make this day last a little longer

I am thankful for…the things that God is teaching me...things like learning to LOVE instead of JUDGE, learning to trust even when I can't see, and that it is the constant stream of little moments that make for a happy childhood.

From the kitchen…Thinking about a Seder meal for Friday and planning for a sunrise pot-luck on Sunday.

I am wearing…Comfy skirt and shirt.  I LOVE skirts (except when riding the motorbike...then they are kind of annoying).

I am creating…a happy childhood for my kids... full of love, laughter, and looking to Jesus.

I am going…to try to be more daring...to do the things I really WANT to do instead of just doing the things I think I won't fail at.

I am reading…No Biking in the House, finishing up Practicing Affirmation, and thinking that Global Soccer Mom might be next.  Seriously people, having a Kindle has changed my life. Not only can I get English books now, but I can finally read one-handed while nursing.  Something I have NEVER been able to do.

I am hoping… for some BIG things. Things I am not ready to share, but BIG nonetheless.

I am hearing…Lucy snoring.

Around the house…Five little people sleeping soundly, hopefully being filled with good dreams and feelings of love.

One of my favorite things…Caleb asking me about five times a day, "So, how is Bethany doing?"  He has such a big heart!

A few plans for the rest of the week: Jason has a four-day weekend for Easter + Spiritual Day...hoping to find a good balance of getting stuff done + enjoying time together.

Here is picture I am sharing…Since this week has apparently been rainbow themed, with rainbow cupcakes for a shower and rainbow sticky rice for Levi's birthday, I figured I would finish it off with some rainbow pancakes for dinner.  Who can say no to dessert WITH your dinner?

Random iPhone Photos

Back when iPhones first came out, I got one.  We were living in Orlando at the time and we would often be out all day (our work hours were mornings and then afternoon/evenings).  I was thick into my online presence, both with blogging every day and with selling digital scrapbooking templates.  I hated being gone all day, always worried about checking email so that my customers wouldn't be waiting for me to fix a problem. Enter iphone.  I loved being able to check email every so often and then be able to relax and enjoy my family.  I also loved that the phone had a decent quality camera.

When we moved to Indonesia, the phone got put away.  After about a year or so, Jason's phone broke and so he got out the iphone, had it unlocked, and he has been using it ever since. It's nice being able to use an iPhone for less than $10 a month (what it costs to "top up" our card.  We never actually run out of money, but they limit how long you can run on the same top up card). 

I am usually carrying around my big camera, but every once in a while I leave it home and am thankful to have Jason's phone to grab. Also, Jason is often out without me and although he doesn't usually take pictures, sometimes he surprises me.

Since Jason doesn't charge his phone at the computer, we rarely download photos.  But when we do, it is fun to see the randomness that emerges.  So here, for your viewing pleasure, totally unedited randomness from the Phillips iPhone.

 

Rain pouring in through the roof of a restaurant

 

The rain is just sometimes INSANE here!

 

As are intersections!

 

Photobooth for the iphone

 

Alaina posing at "one tree hill" -- a favorite hiking spot for staff this year. And notice the skirt and flip flops for hiking...her motto is, "If the Duggar girls can do it, so can I!"

 

Sometimes I am literally scared for my life as we drive behind these crazy-packed trucks. Notice the distance I ask Jason to keep from them!

 

One of our favorite new things in Bandung. Little things get make you happy when you have been away from little American luxuries for so long!

 

And the kids like that they turn their tongues different colors.  And yes, Levi is wearing a Superman outfit out in public.  Because, you know, it was just one of those days.  One of those days where I realized that I was "that mom" -- the one who lets her daughter go out looking like this (sock muscles and all).  How can I say no to "Super Sissy!"

The hotel where we have a membership is one of the most beautiful places. I just love the pool at night.

 

Just me and my girl

 

Not sure about this one. Looks like Jason and Katie took a ride into the kampung (local village). I love that Katie is holding her "elephant elly."  "Elly" has become the word for "comfort item" around this house. Caleb has a green-stuffed elephant and the rest of the kids have blankies.  But when Katie was little, she just thought "Elly" was the term for people special things.  So now everyone has an Elly.  Katie, well, she has three.  She has her "big elly" (a big pink blanket), her "flower elly" (a smaller flowered blanket), and her "Elephant Elly" (pictured above).

 

___

 

So how is that for some randomness today?

Five Years

 

It's hard to believe that it has been five years since this little guy entered our lives.  Five years ago, on a Monday in Malaysia, my doctor told me that my fluid levels were too low and he induced me right then and there.  Five years ago I waited for my baby to arrive, being very much surprised at the words, "It's a boy" (although we had decided to wait to find out, I was pretty convinced I was having a girl!)  Five years ago little Levi Sebastian entered my life and I have never been the same.

 

I won't even try to come up with words for this kid.  Suffice it to say, he has been a joy from day one.  Never has the world seen a happier kid, an easier kid, or a sweeter kid.  He has never gone through a "hard" stage (we won't talk about potty training, though) and he has been blessing us with big belly laughs since he was three months old.  He is all Jason, in a little boy's body, and I couldn't love him more.

 

His birthday, like everyone else's, fell on a Sunday this year which meant we all got to spend the day together. He chose to go to the zoo for the day, but not before his birthday breakfast.  The plan these last few months was that he wanted to go to McDonald's for breakfast (something we have only done a few times) but at the last minute decided he wanted rainbow sticky rice instead.  He wanted it rainbow colored, but insisted that he did NOT want it in a rainbow shape.  He also instructed me that the words, "BIRTHDAY BOY" were to be on the cake.  His wish was my command!

 

Next, we were headed off to the zoo.  I snapped a few pictures before we left.

 

And I had Jason snap a few (don't mind the wet hair)

And one of the little lady...

 

Now on to the zoo.  You have to understand...Levi LOVES animals.  Loves them more than anything.  So it is only natural that he would want to go to the zoo (wearing one of his many animal shirts). However, let me say that this zoo is pretty sad and pathetic.  There are actually a number of animals but the conditions are so horrific that in the west, I am sure that the zoo owners would be carted off to prison for animal cruelty.  Thankfully, the kids still enjoyed it...along with half our city on a Sunday morning.

My kids loved being able to feed the animals.  We limited it to grass though...unlike the hoards of other people feeding them peanuts, Cha-Chas (like M&M's), and even cigarettes (yes, Jason actually saw an orangutan smoking!) 

 

At least there were some pretty sights...

After the zoo it was off to our what-now-seems-to-be-traditional birthday lunch...pizza and slurpees.  Though I have to admit we have had so many birthdays that the only person who actually wanted pizza and slurpees was Levi...but he was the birthday boy so we couldn't really say no.

 

 

And I have to slip this one in since it was a special day for her too:  one month!

 

That night, we celebrated with some friends. Levi had told me that he wanted chocolate cake with blue icing.  On the morning of his birthday he said what he really wanted was animal cupcakes.  I am not that talented, especially on a few hours notice. So instead, I pulled these off.  They don't look great, but it was the best I could do.  I'm no cookie or cake decorator! But for what they lack in looks, they make up for in taste.  I use this recipe for the cookies (rolled out nice and thick!) with a powdered sugar glaze icing and they are YUM!  Little zebra striped cookies on top of chocolate cupcakes with white icing...animal cupcakes.

 

And never have I seen a cuter or happier boy than when we were all singing to him.

 

 

Little Levi, I hope all your wishes (and more!) come true.  You are such a blessing in our lives and I can't wait to see what God has planned for you.  Keep smiling, keep laughing, and spread that joy to everyone you meet!

 

The First Day of the New Normal

Yesterday was the first day.  The first full day of Jason being back at work and me being home with the kiddos with nothing on the to-do list (he was back on Friday and Monday as well, but I was out most of both those days!)  Although I was sad for the time to come, I was also looking forward to it.  I crave routine.  I crave quiet.  I crave not having to go anywhere.  After three weeks of non-stop going, going, going I was ready for a new kind of normal.

And so yesterday, I soaked it all in.  I soaked in the bliss of not having to go anywhere, of being able to just hold and feed my baby, read to my little ones, and just BE.  We had time...that glorious, amazing, and often-taken-advantage-of gift of TIME.  We had time for...

 

Playing with chalk...

 

 

Laying on the driveway and staring at the gorgeous sky and trees...

 

 

Baking banana bread (two kinds!)...

 

 

For letting little kitchen helpers make pizza dough...

 

For enjoying the end result of our cooking...pizza puffs...

For playing in the afternoon rain...

And for attempting to not get our dress wet by wearing rubber gloves (??!?)

 

I think I like the new normal...

Kind of Like a Video Game

 

I've never been a big video game player. I never really saw the use of spending hours playing a game with no real purpose other than winning. "Winning" was never quite enough incentive for me to keep going.  Even now, I just don't get the hype and excitement over games.  My almost-five-year old may be a pro at Angry Birds, but I just don't have it in me.

When I was younger (middle school maybe?), I did go through a bout of playing.  We had gotten a Nintendo for Christmas and Super Mario Brothers was all the rage.  All my friends were playing it and so I thought I should learn just so I knew what people were talking about it.

I wasn't very good and I didn't enjoy it much.  I would spend hours trying to figure out a level.  I would learn where to jump, where the secret short cuts were, who to dodge, where to find more coins, and so on.  It would take me FOREVER to learn enough to make it to the other side alive.  And then, when I finally felt like I had accomplished something by completing a level, a new level would appear and I would have to start all over.  I just kept thinking, "I just finished THAT level!  Now I have to start again with something totally different?  I have to learn completely new tricks, new passage ways, new dangers to avoid, new treasures to be captured."  I didn't like it and after a few weeks I finally just gave up.  I never did save that princess.

As I was travelling back from Jakarta last week, soaking in the quietness of a gorgeous train ride, I found myself thinking, "My spiritual life is kind of like a video game." I spend weeks (or months or years) trying to master certain things.  I work hard at dealing with sin in my life, learning to overcome obstacles in my path, trying to find ways to make me stronger and better able to fight.  It takes lots and lots of practice. I start over daily. I work hard, I fall hard, and I keep going.  And then, after what seems like forever, I realize that I "get it."  I have actually found some mastery over an area of sin in my life. I finally know how to deal with tough situations I am facing.  I learn new things about God and His character and how those should affect me.  I feel like I am flying high.  And then.

 

And then "a new level" shows up.  After a few moments of glowing in my growth and understanding of God, I realize that I have just scratched the surface and there is so much more.  There are so many parts of His character that He wants me to see and understand (and then imitate).  There are so many areas of sin that so far He has let grace cover but NOW He is saying we need to deal with them.  There are new treasures to be found and more dangers to fight and avoid.  In some ways it feels like starting over.

So that's where I am...at the beginning of a "new level" and I feel like I have no idea what I am doing. God is showing me big things, and at once it scares me and excites me. I am looking ahead and thinking, "Um...You want me to do WHAT?" I am seeing the path before me and fretting that there is no way I will make it through.  I'd much rather sit around congratulating myself for the areas of sin I have already found relief from than see the areas of sin He is now saying it is time to deal with.

On the other hand, I look at the path ahead and say, "I get to do WHAT?"  Really, Lord?  You trust ME with THAT? You really want to bless me in these incredible ways? There is no way...

I can do all things through Him who gives me strength.

I'm scared of the yuckiness I have to dig up. I am excited to see how God sets me free.

I'm excited to see the blessings He has planned along the way.  I'm afraid that my fear will keep me from accepting them.

 

The Word of the Lord is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.

 

Without being rooted, I will never make it to the other side.

 

___

 

And the picture?  Ten little blessings I get to see every day. Even better when covered with chalk.

 

Today...4.8.2011

Outside my window…darkness

I am thinking… that my spiritual life sort of feels like a video game (more on that in a later post!)

I am thankful for…new mercies EVERY morning.  Hoping I can offer them as eagerly as I accept them.

From the kitchen…Thinking about pancakes and bacon for breakfast.  It's Jason's first day back to work since Bethany...a good breakfast is much deserved!

I am wearing…My favorite comfy pants.

I am creating…so much.  Unfortunately it is all in my head at this point.

I am going…to miss my hubby as he goes back to work but I am looking forward to finding a new "normal" routine.  These last three weeks have been AMAZING but severely lacking in a schedule for me or anyone else.

I am reading…Practicing Affirmation. Read The Duties of Parents while on a trip to the Embassy for Bethany's passport.  Can I just say how much I LOVE having a Kindle and being able to have access to English books???

I am hoping… to see real change in me in some important areas. Eternity (and an end to the fight against sin) can't come soon enough.

I am hearing…A loud fan and a little dog snoring.

Around the house…Six sleeping people and one sleeping dog.

One of my favorite things…This time in the morning when no one else is awake and I can soak in the peace and quietness.  I am so much more ready to meet the demands of the day when I get to start slowly and quietly.

A few plans for the rest of the week: Family Fun Festival at school today and another hike to another waterfall this weekend.

Here is picture I am sharing…Two years ago today.  Little Levi in Penang, Malaysia.  I seriously can't believe how long his hair was!  Apparently my love of his curls totally blinded me to the fact that he totally looks like a girl!